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Welcome to time. Yes. There are many things to behold in this week's Abflats post, and none of which are available for holding. You can probably read them though unless you can't read this language or at all. It's very simple as to why you were looked down as an elephant and that reason is because you aren't an elephant. It is not possible for elephants to read any language at all. Therefore, I can safely say, assuming, for which, you are not an elephant. Unless, of course, you were some intergalactic species of elephant that can read English but cannot speak English or read any other language and is basically just an elephant that has the ability to read English writing.

Now, I would like to talk to you about grape salad. There is a very widespread epidemic going around known as grape salad, and it is sadly unknown by most of the population. Basically, it's just a bowl of grapes. That's all grape salad is. But also, it contains lit firecrackers. Lit firecrackers are also in grape salad. When you're sitting there enjoying grapes BANG. Your bottom jaw is annihilated. That's how they get you. Grape salad also contains oats. Only five oats though. If it has six oats it is completely inedible, and if it has four oats it is lethal poisonous. Grape salad is also invisible unless you were born in a select list of countries. Bulgarians cannot see grape salad. We must fight to stop this disease before it breaks out of control.

Here at Abflats, we also like to talk about sports. As a matter of fact, we like to think of new ideas for sports. Well, I think I have come up with an idea for sports that would make great strides in television ratings. Basically, the sport would be played with two teams in some sort of arena or stadium. The teams can be made up of seven or eight people, and one player has to be the team leader in order to make up strategies to win the game. The object of this game is to hit a player on the opposing team with a ball. Once this is done your team gets a point. One important rule to note, however, is that hitting another player with a ball is not allowed. If you hit another player with a ball, be the player on your team or the opponent's, you are indefinitely thrown from the game and cannot compete for the rest of the match. This means each team will need to bring in new people everytime someone gets hit with a ball, and eventually they will have to start bringing in people from the streets. It will be called Major League Sinus Infection and first team to three hundred and sixty seven points wins.

-Griffin