Lamps and How to Infiltrate Their Families

Today, I am going to do something different. I am going to talk about lamps and how to infiltrate their families. By reading this, you have signed up for this mission that we have been given by intelligently colored rocks. We were assigned to figure out why lamps have families and how they act with said families. I have a few steps in mind in order to get to the bottom of this major social dilemma. It's very important that we complete this in a timely manner. Because if we don't, lamps will continue to have families and we will have no idea why or how they act with those families. Why on earth would you want to postpone this extremely important gathering?

Firstly, I would like to make note that lamps travel in groups. Rarely will you see a lamp by itself. So killing one and taking it's clothes in order to disguise yourself as a lamp will be a challenge. If, and when, we get a disguise, the next part of the mission will also be very difficult. Every so often, there is a mass gathering of the lamp kind in cities across the nation. We must get into that gathering and find the main, 'Mama Lamp'. Sources have told us that is what the lamps call their leader. We need to get into the lamp gathering and observe the Mama Lamp's actions and movements. We don't even know how lamps are able to move yet, so accomplishing this mission will give us a plethora of valuable information.

So, that is my plan for figuring out what the lamps are all about. I hope you will consider my ideas and possibly implement them into your own mission plans. If I can be of any further assistance, please don't hesitate to look somewhere else for answers. The lamps will be compromised, I can guarantee it. They will no longer be living in the shadows of their own light. We will expose them. We will not surrender. We will not negotiate with the lamp kind. They are done.

-Griffin