Candles Only

Today is the day in which I am going to write this post. Mostly because the last post was on the 20th and 20+7 is 27 and today is the 27th and happy birthday. I'm going to make an effort to put at least one math problem in my posts. I feel this country needs more exposure to math. Like, if I were to say, that, commas, look. Sometimes I get emails from the ghost of Christmas past. His real name is Corppie. It's really weird, I know.

If I know you, and I'm pretty sure I don't, we should totally start a candle company called Candles Only. Our specialty will be garage doors, but we'll also install sushi. It could seriously be profitable. I had no idea what color it could be until I googled 'what color could it be.' I haven't actually googled that so I still have no idea. I'm sure it will be purple or something. Have I told you the one about the internet? It's got fourteen different flavored ice creams installed inside it. So, just go to your favorite news site, and eat your monitor. It could taste like pistachio or something I don't know what your favorite ice cream is. 

If I were to rain immediately after large barn house animals fell from the sky, would that aggravate you? And I don't mean your everyday barn house animals. I mean rhinos and newly born giraffes. You know I just found out that giraffes are communist? Like what the crap? How can giraffes have the brain power to have a system of government that obviously doesn't work, but not have the brain power to be able to see that it doesn't work. It's absurd. I hate giraffes and their fascist governments. Down with parliament.

-Griffin