Welcome to the first post a great long while. So long, in fact, that it's about three feet long. That's exactly, exactly, thirty-six inches, and even better, nine hours. If you had ever seen a post of this length, you would have seen a post of similar length. That being said, I plan on making all Abflats posts at least four paragraphs long until further notice to make up for the many days I have fallen behind. It is completely my fault. By another perspective, however, it wasn't my fault at all.
You see, back in nineteen forty-one, December seventh to be exact, which was a date that should have lived in infamy, the United States of America was an ice cream. It was not even a good ice cream. It was like pistachio or something. Just awful. Anyway, that was about three hours before the United States officially entered World War the second. The leaders at the time thought that, since the world would be looking at us, we shouldn't be soft-serve dairy products.
Next to impossibly measurable amounts of time later, you're reading this sentence. Welcome to the first ever sentence to begin with the word welcome. This sentence continues to create the paragraph of Absolutely Not Filled With Lies. Speaking of official names for paragraphs. The United Duck Federation of Northern Earth has sent out a statement stating that they will continue to state things and also that ducks should from now on be known as snakes. Snakes everywhere were outrages.
This just in, bread. Next, there were at least two things to note about the upcoming Tree Event. Firstly, all trees will be made of wood, bark, and leaves. No trees, under any circumstances, shall be made of 'composite metals'. Second, all leafs shall be any color that are not bright turquoise florescent pink. All other colors are fine, just those two, specifically, are off limits. Nearing the end of our crow now, it's actually a snake.
-Griffin
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