Strange Shape

Can you even remember the last time you had a bagel? Most likely not. I know this because recently scientists have confirmed that bagels are the leading cause of memory loss. This is true. So true, in fact, that it's not a lie. Scientists have been quoted to have said, "bagels cause you to be forgetful, specifically." No one knew what they meant at the time, but a group of analysts agreed, some four hundred years later, that the scientists meant that bagels cause you to forget things.

Speaking of forgetting things, you probably don't remember ji plug pu - melon nai. Because if you did, you wouldn't have a mouth. Mark my words, this is not something you will want to remember. You definitely want to forget ji plug pu - melon nai or you can basically say goodbye to your life savings and your car's left front wheel. There's no stopping it now, it will sweep the world just as Oregon did with the country-sized brooms back in the 1920s. That is, of course, why we call it Oregon today.

Since you've made it this far, I might as well tell you that while writing this exact sentence, I temporarily went deaf in my right ear. This is a puzzling turn of events, but a fortunate one. You see, prior to losing connection with my right ear, I did not know what to write in this paragraph. I was just typing words and, all of a sudden, ringing. It was as if a cloud attacked me. You know, because when clouds attack people they go deaf in their right ear. You go deaf in your left ear when shrubs attack; it's an easy mistake to make.

-Griffin