Yes, it's that time of year again. The time of year that is the time of year that everyone always emphasizes about the time of year that it currently is. That's right, you guessed it, correct, it's almost exactly four months away from Easter. It's very exciting seeing all the local rabbits exist around this time. Almost no other animal even happens right now. Only ones that bounce and make almost no noise.
Can you believe that today is Thursday? I can remember Wednesday like it was yesterday. And I don't mean the Wednesday from yesterday. I mean the Wednesday from last week, November 18th. Good times. There were clouds that day, probably. I can remember them as clearly as one remembers clouds from eight days ago. They were so magnificent that they could have probably run the Geneva Convention of 1949.
No one expected mice to run for president of United Arab Emirates. Mostly because no human can pronounce Emirates, let alone any mice. If people living in the United Arab Emirates looked almost directly to the east, they would notice something odd. A bad oman, some might say. Wow.
-Griffin
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Thursday, November 19, 2015
Strange Shape
Can you even remember the last time you had a bagel? Most likely not. I know this because recently scientists have confirmed that bagels are the leading cause of memory loss. This is true. So true, in fact, that it's not a lie. Scientists have been quoted to have said, "bagels cause you to be forgetful, specifically." No one knew what they meant at the time, but a group of analysts agreed, some four hundred years later, that the scientists meant that bagels cause you to forget things.
Speaking of forgetting things, you probably don't remember ji plug pu - melon nai. Because if you did, you wouldn't have a mouth. Mark my words, this is not something you will want to remember. You definitely want to forget ji plug pu - melon nai or you can basically say goodbye to your life savings and your car's left front wheel. There's no stopping it now, it will sweep the world just as Oregon did with the country-sized brooms back in the 1920s. That is, of course, why we call it Oregon today.
Since you've made it this far, I might as well tell you that while writing this exact sentence, I temporarily went deaf in my right ear. This is a puzzling turn of events, but a fortunate one. You see, prior to losing connection with my right ear, I did not know what to write in this paragraph. I was just typing words and, all of a sudden, ringing. It was as if a cloud attacked me. You know, because when clouds attack people they go deaf in their right ear. You go deaf in your left ear when shrubs attack; it's an easy mistake to make.
-Griffin
Speaking of forgetting things, you probably don't remember ji plug pu - melon nai. Because if you did, you wouldn't have a mouth. Mark my words, this is not something you will want to remember. You definitely want to forget ji plug pu - melon nai or you can basically say goodbye to your life savings and your car's left front wheel. There's no stopping it now, it will sweep the world just as Oregon did with the country-sized brooms back in the 1920s. That is, of course, why we call it Oregon today.
Since you've made it this far, I might as well tell you that while writing this exact sentence, I temporarily went deaf in my right ear. This is a puzzling turn of events, but a fortunate one. You see, prior to losing connection with my right ear, I did not know what to write in this paragraph. I was just typing words and, all of a sudden, ringing. It was as if a cloud attacked me. You know, because when clouds attack people they go deaf in their right ear. You go deaf in your left ear when shrubs attack; it's an easy mistake to make.
-Griffin
Thursday, November 12, 2015
Eye Boxes
Welcome back to an actual welcome back that will actually precede an actual post of actuals. No more of that not actualling, hopefully. I don't know if you know this, but the real reason that I didn't write those last two posts were because I was abducted by cloud aliens. Cloud aliens are sort of like clouds that we have on Earth, only they're bright purple and from space and/or Oklahoma. Oklahoma is the only place on Earth that you can find cloud aliens.
When the cloud aliens abducted me, they sent me through a series of dangerous tests. The first one was a twenty question, multiple choice quiz on the alien water cycle. It's exactly the same as the Earth water cycle only a lot more purple. The next test involved boiling some alien water at temperatures right around 373.15 Kelvin. It's identical to boiling Earth water, only it's much, much more purple. The third, and probably most dangerous of them all, involved alien hurricanes. They do not relate to Earth hurricanes in the slightest. Have you seen those giant tire dumps that are filled with nothing but rubber tires and they're just like huge piles of tires? Well alien hurricanes are just like that only very purple.
Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking thoughts. Well hear me out, I did actually get abducted by cloud aliens. I did not, in fact, just forget about the posts. I would never do such a horrendous thing. You should be ashamed of yourself. If it wasn't for the cloud aliens, we would never have developed such advanced early warning systems for giant tire dumps. Do you ever stop and think about how offensive you could be acting towards the clouds? No. No you do not. Salmon.
-Griffin
When the cloud aliens abducted me, they sent me through a series of dangerous tests. The first one was a twenty question, multiple choice quiz on the alien water cycle. It's exactly the same as the Earth water cycle only a lot more purple. The next test involved boiling some alien water at temperatures right around 373.15 Kelvin. It's identical to boiling Earth water, only it's much, much more purple. The third, and probably most dangerous of them all, involved alien hurricanes. They do not relate to Earth hurricanes in the slightest. Have you seen those giant tire dumps that are filled with nothing but rubber tires and they're just like huge piles of tires? Well alien hurricanes are just like that only very purple.
Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking thoughts. Well hear me out, I did actually get abducted by cloud aliens. I did not, in fact, just forget about the posts. I would never do such a horrendous thing. You should be ashamed of yourself. If it wasn't for the cloud aliens, we would never have developed such advanced early warning systems for giant tire dumps. Do you ever stop and think about how offensive you could be acting towards the clouds? No. No you do not. Salmon.
-Griffin
Friday, November 6, 2015
I'M THE WORST
SORRY I WAS SUPER BUSY AGAIN TODAY PLEASE DON'T BE MAD I PROMISE I WILL GET CAUGHT BACK UP NEXT WEEK I'M SO laundry
-GRIFFIN
-GRIFFIN
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