Crops

This event right now is really quite unusual. I am actually writing a post before I become busy on a Thursday. I will still be busy later, but I'm actually writing a post this time instead of pretended to be a plant. Speaking of plants, do you know how many species of plants exist? Many. Many species. At least four. Maybe even more than four. That's all I could count when I was pretended to be a plant, though. I'm sure there are more plants than that though. The German folk probably know a lot more about that topic than I do, however. 

Speaking of Germany, have you seen the new oats? They're a lot better than their predecessor, boring oats. They're also round. They're round oats. If you put a lot of them in a bowl with mucus it makes oatmeal. How many oats does it take to make it an oat meal? Probably more than one. If you ate one oat it wouldn't be a very good meal. They probably even feed members of congress more food than that. A single oat is not part of a balanced breakfast. 

Recently, I came up with an idea for a new sport. The main premiss of the sport is evaporation. Basically, if you consider continental drift, rounds last twenty minutes. After twenty minutes, the round is over. After a round concludes, a new one begins. After the game is over a winner is crowned. I estimate that one game could last up to 40 years. Then the winner gets a prize in a bust of his own head. The bust is about sixteen feet wide and made of solid granite. After the winner wins, we lob the massive bust into his house at a speed of 30 to 91 meters per second. We sometimes use cattle prods, which are now rechargeable too. 

This will be the final paragraph of this week's Abflats post. I will try writing all future Abflats posts at a length of four paragraphs to make up for the many weeks of failure. I don't know how long the four paragraph posts will last, but I estimate that one game could last up to 40 years. Either way, the Mayans cannot reconquer the Arctic Circle for many reasons. The most important reason is that the Mayans never actually conquered the Arctic Circle to begin with. Another quite important reason is that all of the Mayans are dead. Okay bye.


-Griffin